All,

This will be a weekly occurrence for the Spring ‘09 season. Check back for updates.

A recap has been requested by team assistant to the assistant captain B.J. Respess-Kovacik.
 
Here is the recap: After exhibiting the stellar defensive prowess that had other teams “making” in their tighty-whities last season, the Meatballers started off the season in typical fashion, opening up an 8-2 deficit to a particularly stinky “Ista” squad. I mean - these “Ista” players couldnt hit the broad side of a barn.
 
The Meatballers seemed determined to start off their 3rd season in fantastically piss-poor fashion, when Steven “Dont make me bend over” Christensen couldnt quite get to a sharply (barely) hit groundball at his feet and walked 12-14 people in the first 2/3 of an inning. This was followed by stellar non-defensive efforts by the rest of the squad. A spectator was quoted as saying “I think I just sharted” (Spectator identity not revealed for security reasons.)
 
These efforts continued into the 3rd inning, when Shannon “Double Play Inducing” Harcourt and Marc “Cant get the ball off the ground” Russo grounded directly to the opposing shortstop for a couple quick outs. It all seemed to be going downhill, until Steven “My back doesnt bend that far” Christensen discovered his late-breaking slider. “Ista” players were baffled. They simply could not figure Christensen out. It was like the second coming of Dennis “Oil Can” Boyd. Christensen struck out at least 15 batters the rest of the evening, and the Meatballers sticks got going.
 
With the Meatballers clinging to a 10-8 lead and needing to waste 6 minutes at the end of the game - Pafamel “Red” Zinn did something noone had ever seen before. He didnt swing. This could be the start of something great for these 3rd generation Meatballers…..
 
Further updates to come.
 
NOTE: Lauren “Dont call me Mel Gibson” Cheadle-Tolly-Johnston was traded back to the Meatballers when she failed a physical with the Japanese co-ed D Wednesday Night Saki-League doctors. Details were not available at this time. She is scheduled to be back in uniform next week.

Spring 2009 schedule is posted under the link to the right.

All,

Spring ‘09 Meatballers - Season 3 is upon us.

{Note - Meatballer management is currently in negotiations with a major network on a 7-8 episode miniseries chronicling the trials and tribulations of the ‘09 Meatballer squad (Johnston not included)}.

Chief ARPD Softball Monday Evening Co-ed D Analyst Bucky Waldoberg has officially released his spring predictions, and had the following to say about the Meatballers current squad:

” They’re not very good.”

” That shortstop is actually short.”

” The lanky red-headed kid would swing at a peanut if the pitcher threw it.”

” Is the third baseman talking to he opposing base coach again?”

” What’s the deal with all the beards? Fat bastards.”

” They got an asian?”

” Who’s that new kid, Respess-Kovacik? She’s got a hell of an eye and can really pull the ball to left.”

Waldoberg has the over/under on Meatballer wins this season at 3. Im taking the over. Anyone else?